Speaking of sexual activity in terms of bases, sometimes doing so can make the interaction with your partner(s) seem more goal-oriented (i.e., to “hit that home run”, or “get to home base”).
Keep in mind that sexual activity doesn’t just have to be about how far you can get with someone.
1st Base - Is Kissing, french, open mouth or just a peck.
But I think this is kissing, holding, maybe what the kid’s called “necking”, back in 1973. Hands in appropriate places and just having a solid makeout session. Think of second base as fun with the body’s largest organ! I don’t really know if there’s a name for the female handjob except the phrase “diddling” which just makes me feel like a gross old man to say. So you may have that second base lead-off and eyeballing second base like a fat kid staring at a burrito, but before you go sliding in face first (not feet first, you could seriously injure somebody. ) here’s where you want to pump the brakes for a second and refer to Episode 5, “And She Has a Weird Rash”.
And just in case you don’t have one, here, here’s a link to a free flashlight app for your i Phone. Now, I know you’re asking, “Jo E, if a home run is sex, is there no such thing as a grand slam in Denny’s AND in baseball? I’m uhh…I’m not really sure how this one measures up or fits into everything. If a home run is you scoring, and a grand slam is other people scoring…hmmm. In today’s society, thanks to things like Viagra, there really is no “end of the game” anymore.
Get that, and just bust it out before you do anything and have a look. Even dudes who go against Darwinism are being allowed to still run the bases.
Only now, instead of looking for Waldo, you’re looking for herpes.
And he’s a much bigger national threat than Waldo ever was.