Cultural dating perspectives

Last month we heard a presentation from the Marines on the SMVF TA Center team who provided us with additional insight into their perspectives and experiences.

As a civilian, I have always found it helpful to hear from service members, veterans, or their family members because the fact is, from the moment they enter the service, their experiences are very different than our civilian experiences.

Nicole Unice is the author of “ Brave Enough: Getting Over our Fears, Flaws and Failures to Live Bold and Free.” (Tyndale, 2015) and travels frequently enough to almost feel like she can fly. Read More A wise man once told me that there were only two outcomes for dating relationships: getting married or breaking up.

“The secret,” he said, “is knowing how to handle a dating relationship so you know if the other person is worth marrying or he or she is honored in the breakup.” Unfortunately, it seems like many young singles struggle to figure out just how to handle dating–and I’m not the only one who’s noticed how weird the Christian dating scene can be.

From a young age, information we absorb from the world around us influences our: Lifestyle disagreements in cross cultural relationships Lifestyle disagreements are arguments involving daily life.

These disagreements can sometimes be sparked by resentment because one or both partners feel their culture is being rejected or attacked when the other refuses to follow their customs or traditions.

From a behavioral-health perspective, service members and veterans have also accomplished things that many civilians can’t and, politics aside, they have served our country.

Recognizing these strengths can go a long way in establishing civilian/SMVF relationships.

Outside the Duggar-verse, there is the less overt but just as prevalent “ideal spouse” dating. Did she want my sweatshirt because she was cold, or because she likes me?

Cross cultural issues faced by couples include loss of identity, conflicts over differences in fundamental beliefs, clashes in parenting tactics, struggles with unsupportive families and different interpretations of an event relating to some aspect of differing cultures.

Counselling for cross cultural issues can help couples step outside of their restrictive cultural identities to see one another with greater clarity, as individuals. It's not just about the national dish, the fashions people wear, the gods they worship, or even the places they live.

The loyalty we often feel towards our own culture and traditions can sometimes mean we find it difficult to understand another’s.

In a relationship situation when two people have differing beliefs, it is these feelings that can be pushed to the forefront, overwhelming the individual feelings we have for one another.